Rita Skeeter, the most notorious reporter in the wizarding world,sat poised, herQuick-Quotes Quillhovering over a fresh piece of parchment. Across from her sattwo of the most powerful and unpredictable wizards in existence—Albus DumbledoreandRaja Rudra Kumara.

One was anancient, wise, grandfatherly figure.

The other? Achaotic agent of pure insanity and unfiltered truth.

This was going to belegendary.

Rita Skeeter:"Gentlemen, let's get straight to the point! With the Dark Lord's return, are there any major changes in Hogwarts' curriculum?"

Dumbledore:"We are focusing on defensive spells, survival skills, and—"

Raja:"Yes. I personally proposed adding 'How to Punch Dark Lords in the Face 101' as a core subject."

Dumbledore:"That was rejected."

Raja:"Temporarily rejected. I'll reapply with evidence."

Rita Skeeter:"Speaking of that, you were seen using an odd contraption in the Triwizard Tournament. A... flying board? Care to elaborate?"

Raja:"Ah, yes! My Next-Gen Hoverboard. Broomsticks are outdated. Why ride a stick when you can glide like aking? Faster, sleeker, and best of all—no splinters in awkward places."

Dumbledore:"Raja, broomsticks have a long tradition in the wizarding world."

Raja:"And I have a long tradition of being awesome."

Rita Skeeter:"Fascinating! Now, what exactly happened to theInfernaura, the hybrid dragon from the First Task?"

Raja:"Oh, Ragnarok? He's my pet now. He guards myisland mansion in space."

Rita Skeeter:"I—wait, what?"

Dumbledore:"Don't ask."

Rita Skeeter:"There is much speculation about the infamousDefense Against the Dark Artscurse. Hogwarts keeps losing teachers! Any thoughts?"

Raja:"Simple. Voldemort jinxed it. My plan?Reverse-jinx it."

Rita Skeeter:"Reverse-jinx? How?"

Raja:"By appointing someone so unkillable, even the curse gives up."

Rita Skeeter:"And who is this... unkillable professor?"

Raja:"Me."

Dumbledore:"Also temporarily rejected."

Raja:"Again, only fornow."

Rita Skeeter:"Rumors are swirling about your latest alchemical inventions. Care to explain?"

Raja:"Yes! Introducing theMagic-Pad—a magical tablet that stores information, plays wizard chess, and, most importantly,lets you order food from anywhere."

Rita Skeeter:"Fascinating! And theGod-Eye Camera?"

Raja:"A high-speed magical camera that can catch a Snitch's movementframe by frame.Quidditch referees can finally do their job!"

Dumbledore:"Raja, we do not need cameras in Quidditch."

Raja:"Says the man who letsSnapereferee sometimes."

Rita Skeeter:"And thebeauty potions?"

Raja:"Let's just say I've made Professor Snape's hairless greasy."

Dumbledore:"That is actually true."

Rita Skeeter:"Now, this is the BIG one. You recently rebranded theOrder of the Phoenixas theOrder of Merlinand made yourself the leader?"

Raja:"Yes. The old name wasbad luck.And let's be honest—who sounds cooler: 'Albus Dumbledore, Leader of the Phoenix' or 'Raja, Supreme Wizard King'?"

Dumbledore:"Raja, you are not a king."

Raja:"That's what they said about Arthur. Look what happened."

Rita Skeeter:"Final question—what is your take on Voldemort's identity?"

Raja:"Ah,Tom Riddle, the tragic half-blood with daddy issues."

Rita Skeeter:"Half-blood? But his followers—"

Raja:"—are morons who think he's pure-blood. Plot twist:he's a Muggle-born with extra steps."

Dumbledore:"I cannot deny that is an... interesting perspective."

Rita Skeeter:"Are you saying theDark Lordis a fraud?"

Raja:"I'm saying he's a dramatic orphan witha snake fetish and bad skincare."

The interviewended with pure chaos.

Dumbledore sighed.

Rita's quill was broken from overuse.

The Wizarding World was about to have a meltdown.

And Raja?

Raja:"I think that went well."

The Hogwarts Express chugged along as Raja lounged across from Harry, Ron, and Hermione, sipping pumpkin juice like a king about to deliverearth-shattering gossip.

Harry, still shell-shocked from yesterday'sdisastrous interviewwith Rita Skeeter, looked at Raja warily.

Harry:"Mate, what the hell was that yesterday? You just casually dropped that Voldemort is a dramatic orphan with a snake fetish, rebranded the Order of the Phoenix, and declared yourself Wizard King!"

Raja:"Correction:Supreme Wizard King."

Ron nearly choked on his Chocolate Frog."You can't just make up titles for yourself!"

Raja:"Says the guy who is best known as 'The Sidekick.'"

Ron scowled.

Hermione, who had been scribbling notes all along.

Harry sighed."Okay, let's focus. Raja, you also mentioned something about the Marauders, and I noticed Sirius lookedvery nervous.What's the real story?"

Raja'sevil grinwidened.

Raja: "Oh, you guys are in for a treat."

Raja:"First, who here thinks James Potter and his gang were 'cool' rebels fighting against the system?"

Harry raised his hand.

Ron hesitantly followed.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

Raja:"Wrong. They were Hogwarts'original bullies. TheDraco Malfoy gang before Draco Malfoy even existed."

Harry:"Wait, WHAT?"

Raja:"Let's break it down. The Marauders consisted of: James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus 'Professor Werewolf' Lupin, and Peter 'Betrayal is My Hobby' Pettigrew.

They had one major goal:making Severus Snape's life a living hell."

Ron snorted."Well, Snape's a git."

Raja:"Oh, absolutely. But let's be real—if a gang of popular, rich kids spentyearshexing you, shoving you into walls, and pulling your pants down in public, wouldn't you grow up a little... bitter?"

Harry frowned."But my dad wasn't a bully! He was just... playful?"

Raja:"My guy, your father was OBSESSED with Snape. He bullied him forseven years straight.It wasn't even casual bullying—it was ahobby, a passion, a full-time unpaid internship."

Hermione gasped."Wait. Wait. Wait. Raja, are you saying James was... infatuated with Snape?"

Raja:"Oh, 100%. Jamescould not leave Snape alone.The way he followed him around, obsessed over his every move... that's someweird, repressed energy."

Harry:"No way! He married my Mum!"

Raja:"Yeah.As revenge."

Silence.

Ron looked horrified.

Hermione:"You mean... James married Lily just to take something away from Snape?"

Raja:"Absolutely. Your dad was sodedicated to making Snape miserablethat he went, 'You love Lily? Cool, she's mine now.'"

Harry's eye twitched.

Raja:"And while we're at it, let's talk about how manytimes Snape saved Harry's life."

Harry blinked."Snape tried to kill me in first year!"

Raja:"Oh? You mean the time he wasmuttering a counter-cursewhile Quirrell was actually trying tomurder you?"

Harry's face fell.

Raja:"Or the time when Bludger try to hit you even though you are on the floor and blasting it Oblivion"

Ron:"Blimey, he even tried to protect you in second year... Quidditch match."

Harry clutched his forehead."Oh, Merlin."

Harry groaned, running his hands through his hair."So what you're telling me is... my dad was Malfoy, and Snape was me?"

Raja:"Exactly. Snape was just a poor, awkward, socially inept kid trying to survive while your dad and his rich, handsome gang terrorized him for fun."

Raja: "if you want proof" he showed the Cute teenage Snape photo that he stole from year book from Dumbledore office, seeing cute little teenager of their age they gasped.

Ron, pale, whispered:"Are we they baddies?"

Raja:"No, but your dad definitely was harry, the reason Snape is so repulsive about you is that you're his Nightmare's carbon copy."

Harry:"I need to lie down."

And thus, anotherbeautiful day of chaoson the Hogwarts Express.

Source: Webnovel.com, updated by lotustale.com